一篇优秀的雅思作文是值得我们去认真分析比较,找出可以借鉴的加分点的。下面,一诺留学小编就来为大家用实例展示一篇优秀的雅思作文是如何炼成的。
首先我们来看一个例子:
I agree that we need to make sure that animals that are used for testing new products have the minimum of suffering. However, I am convinced that animal testing is necessary, and that it will continue to benefit humans in new and wonderful ways.
上面这个例句中,作者将自己的观点隐藏在了一个宾语从句之后,起到了一个欲扬先抑的效果。但是这种效果必须搭配一个展望未来才能起到渲染的效果。我们来对比另外一个例子:
In conclusion, physical punishment can be a useful method of discipline. However, it should be the last choice for parents. If we want to build a world with less violence we must begin at home, and we must teach our children to be responsible.
不难发现,2个句子都使用了相似的衔接方式,即首句委婉地回顾全文,将观点的对立面用"让步"的方式表达出来,同时也是对于主体段观点的回顾。然后再是用转折阐述自己的看法和观点。最后再用一个对于未来的期望来支撑自己的观点。这种顺序安排的优点在于对于文章的主体有很好的总结,但同时观点又是非常鲜明有力的,加上对于未来的润色,使得表达更流畅。
用同样的方法,再来看第三个例句:
To sum up, although there are undoubtedly some problems with increased levels of education, I feel strongly that the country can only progress if all its people are educated to the maximum of their ability.
和前2个结尾不同,第三个结尾尽管也是先回顾了全文,但是它将作者的观点和对未来的期望写在了一个条件状语从句里。如此就给出了同学们在构造"展望未来"时的一个思路,即搭配条件状语从句或者介宾短语跟在观点句之后。此种结尾发展方式同样适用于分析解决型大作文的结尾段布局,比如:
All in all, although the problem of drugs may seem impossible to eliminate, there are concrete steps that can be taken to weaken the hold of drugs on society. The danger from drugs is too great to ignore.
对于毒品对社会的危害,作者先是承认现状的无法改变,进而乐观地阐述了自己的观点即采取了切实有效的行动后可以减弱其危害。最后用毒品的危害性来对未来作展望。换句话说,在社会类分析解决型议论文中,大家在展望未来时可以考虑用强调其长远的影响作为突破口。又如:
In short, there are several things that the government can do to allow more people to finish school. However, a number of society attitudes also have to change if the country.
以上内容就是对一篇优秀的雅思作文剖析介绍,希望对大家的雅思写作备考有帮助。如需了解更多出国留学考试的相关信息,欢迎拨打一诺留学的免费热线400-003-6508或者010-62680991进行出国留学咨询,或者点击一诺留学官方网站http://www.yinuoedu.net/页面的“在线咨询”与一诺留学专家直接对话。微信订阅号:留学圈 (微信帐号:yinuoliuxue )
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